Dear Diary,
Today I was reflecting about the things that are causing me to burn out and I think I finally got the answer to it. Here's the thing, I have so many goals and plans as a person. I want to expand this blog more, I go to school, read books, crochet, work, hang out with friends- unfortunately, all these things take time and I feel like sometimes, there isn't enough time for me to do everything I want to do, and that really is frustrating me, that sometimes, just because I have no idea which one of my plans I should do first, I don't do anything at all.
I wouldn't say that it's a depression phase, but I've been losing motivation to do a lot of things due to the fact that I am forced to split my 24 hours in 10 different ways, and sometimes, the time isn't enough. I feel like I'm stuck in a rut, but I'm still high-functioning at the same time. I see a lot of comments and praise I've been getting from this blog, from my job, I've been getting straight A's in school, but at the same time, I feel like I'm doing this things unmotivated, and I am not giving it my 100% all.
Anyway, I think I would just have to reflect about this more to find the solution to it. I want to be able to give it my 100% on everything I do. I don't want to *just* do it good, I want to do it good, and happily, with motivation and content. Of course, I am grateful. I just feel like I'm feeling depressed over the fact that I cannot let these things fully consume me, because I got 10 other things to do.
Do you get me?
I hope you do.
Goodnight,
Indira.
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